The Raindrop
Refreshing parents, one blog at a time.

Here's the latest update from the Marshalls, who are on a two month family service trip to the Dominican Republic.

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Hello, friends,

Okay, now that we have been here for a little while, I wanted to summarize our experience a little bit – in three categories: the good, the bad, and the dirty.

The good: The kids are great -- fun to play with, read with, and teach.  Like most kids, they’re eager for attention, and get jealous when I’m spending time with the other kids… a situation which is difficult to settle because of my limited language skills.The foundation is wonderful and is run by an inspirational family.  Even our tiny upstairs apartment feels very safe and clean.  The beautiful beach goes on for miles and miles, although some of those miles are sadly not clean.  Violet and I love all the time together, and Paul is using his time for reading.

The bad: We’ve found the townspeople don’t seem happy that we’re here, and are consequently not very helpful.  (Although, unlike other places we’ve visited like Santo Domingo, they don’t even seem to get along well with each other.). This is particularly hard on Paul, who is used to joking around with people and has’t been getting a good response.The water that often comes out of our sink and or shower is brown.The hundreds of "motocochos" which are motorcycles, mopeds or scooters crammed into this small place.  They travel around a big loop to try to pick people up, because they are the  only real taxis or form of transportation here other than walking.  (There are some cars -- mostly trucks -- but not many.)

The dirty:  EVERYTHING!  The motocochos cause much pollution and the roads are either dirt or poorly paved and ruined from storms.  This causes dirt and exhaust to fly everywhere.  There is garbage everywhere.  I sent pictures of the beautiful beaches, but soon I’ll send photos of the garbage. The creek that goes through town and empties into the ocean is just FILLED with trash.  It is overwhelming. There are also a lot of smokers, which doesn’t help my migraines.  Although I've been eaten alive by mosquitoes lately, bugs are typically not a problem. However, the dirt, pollution, dogs running around, smoke, and brown water have caused us to feel dirty since we arrived.

Hope everyone is doing well and I’ll try to send new pictures soon.

Of course, polite people aren't supposed to talk about money -- strange in a culture so obsessed with wealth.

Tonight, while surfing the internet before going to sleep, I came across an amazing interactive website that asks the nosey question.  It reads:

Every year we gaze enviously at the lists of the richest people in world. Wondering what it would be like to have that sort of cash. But where would you sit on one of those lists? Here's your chance to find out.

Aren't you the least little bit curious?

Click here to find out. 

Cheryl and Paul Marshall are our neighbors who live a few houses down the street from us.  They have a five year old daughter Violet who plays regularly with our five year old daughter.  Paul is a police officer and Cheryl is a school teacher.  They seem like your average nice middle class family.

They’re also crazy.

I mean, crazy in that go-for-it, why-not, sounds-like-fun spirit sense of adventure.  Which makes the Marshalls an ideal family for the SixSeeds partnership.  

Recently, Cheryl and Paul decided that they’d like to experience cross cultural service as a family.  Cheryl, who is fluent in Spanish, especially wanted to do so in a Latin America country.  In a span of a few months, they located a reputable community development agency in Las Terrenas of the Domincan Republic.

When I first heard about their research, I asked, “So, are you thinking a week?  Maybe two?"

Cheryl replied, “Well, we were thinking two months.”

Both she and Paul arranged for extended leaves, got someone to watch the house, and started packing.  I asked them if they would be willing to email the SixSeeds Partnership some periodic updates and they were eager to do so.They just touched down a few days ago and sent our family the following email:

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We made it to Las Terrenas safely.  Violet had a little trouble on the taxi after the 5 hours on the bus. She got sick, but dealt with it well. When we got off of the long bus ride we had to get in a taxi van to go over about 10 miles of mountains. It was very windy and hot and I think she was just motion sick from the bus ride.  

We arrived at our apartment as it was getting dark so we were happy to make it safely.The apartment is actually perfect for us and nicer than we expected. We have seen little creatures, but no cockroaches yet.  There is a fan in the bedroom and a fan in the little kitchen/family room.  The place is upstairs and behind a locked gate so we feel pretty secure.  The bed is as hard as a rock and I am feeling pretty spoiled missing my bed at home.  We haven´t had any problems with mosquitoes either. 

We went to the executive director´s house yesterday for an orientation.  There are about 8 volunteers currently with 2 leaving tomorrow.  They are from all over the place:  Germany, England, Switzerland etc. 

The Joses (the ED and his wife) have two young children. One is a 7 year old boy named Kiran. and the other is a 20 month old girl named Ana.  They are both adorable. Violet hit it off with Kiran right away.  It is working out great because today was our first day of work at the library.  We spent about 4 hours just sorting and shelving.  Violet and Kiran and a couple of the local kids just played the whole time. He is bilingual so it gives Violet an easy playmate. 

Other than the volunteers,  we have met no one here that speaks English at all.  It is a strange feeling.  At every other place we have visited, there have always been some people who speak English.

It is very poor here but we notice that it seems much dirtier and there is a lot more garbage everywhere than in any other poor countries we have visited.  It is pretty much what we expected, but it seems crazy how close this is to beautiful beaches.  No one (locally) seems to use the beaches at all. We have only met a couple of street kids on the beaches. 

Anyway, we found an internet cafe not too far from our apartment, but it is a little more expensive than we thought to use it.  I am going to try to email occasionally feel free to post anything to the sixseeds website.  We’ll keep in touch.

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I'll keep you all posted on the Marshalls as they report in. 

“Don’t you just want to throw the thing in the trash?”

Years ago, I was explaining to a girlfriend my frustration with my husband and his Blackberry usage.  It wasn’t so much my husband I wanted to be rid of, but that rectangular hand held device he always kept nearby.  That remarkable piece of technology that made emails instantly accessible, had become my arch-enemy. The Blackberry came into my home without my approval and like Ben Franklin said about fish and guests, got stinky within three days.

My friend nodded knowingly.  Her husband had a Blackberry too and she had the same feeling about it.  We talked about its invasion into our homes.  Sure, our husbands could turn it off, but the business culture forced them to be highly accessible and the Blackberry created a new sense of obligation 24/7.  

Twice in the last ten years, John’s Blackberry landed not in the trash, but in the toilet.  It wasn’t me.  William went through a phase as a toddler where he loved putting things in receptacles – any receptacles.  I luckily looked in the trash many times to find non-trash items - a shoe, a random toy, a spoon, his pajamas, all of which he had thrown in while I wasn’t looking.  

One day we caught him pointing at the toilet.  We found the Blackberry, waterlogged and lifeless.  John tried to dry it out, taking the battery out, wiping it down, practically giving the thing CPR.  We’ve found first hand, William’s method was highly effective at destroying it instantly.  I have to admit, both times gave me some short-lived satisfaction.

Today it’s John who wants to throw my iPhone in the trash.  After I got the phone, it almost immediately felt as if I couldn’t live without it.  It draws you in with its cool features and sleek beauty and to top it off, I can get a lot of work done with it.

As much as I love my iPhone, I recognize like all technology, it can be both good and evil.  The other day, I wrote about trying to “pair down” the excess in our lives.  I’m expanding this concept to the excess of my accessibility.  The more accessible I am to the world, the less accessible I am to my family.

Perhaps someday they’ll make an iPhone that’ll expand time.  Until then, unless William flushes my iPhone down the toilet, it’s up to me to limit my usage.

I pulled the big bottom drawer open to find a sea of mismatched, colorful plastic bowls, plates, cups and an embarrassing number of plastic Red Sox caps originally filled with ice cream from ballgames at Fenway Park. I was careful to take out four cups; two blues, a red and a yellow, and arrange them in a row. Lifting the heavy milk gallon, I poured three cups almost up to the top and one about halfway; one for myself and each of my siblings. This process is one that occurred every night at home, and although it’s a simple, seemingly insignificant one, it represents a characteristic that’s been shaped by having younger siblings, responsibility. Growing up with younger kids teaches you to think more about the group rather than solely yourself.

While having younger siblings teaches me what I should do for the group, at the same time, it teaches me to be wary of what I should not do. Many times I have been reprimanded by my mom for being careless about what I expose my brothers to, mainly music and television. I remember quite vividly when William was three and sitting on my mother’s shoulders while we walked home.

“William, did you finish the bag of goldfish?” I asked.

“Sorry suckerssssss!” he responded.

Naturally, I thought his statement was hilarious, but my mother had a different perspective.  We later learned he had picked up this expression from The Suite Life of Zach and Cody on the Disney Channel. Due to situations like this, I know well what I expose my brothers to, they pick up very quickly and I have learned to be mindful of what I say, do, and introduce them to.

Although sometimes my siblings bother me to no end, I am so grateful for them and the way they have changed me. By having them to look out for, I have become a much more responsible person.

I guess William was right. I am a sucker - a sucker for family and my role as the oldest child.

Yesterday morning, for the first time in a long time, I sat down  to play the piano.  I stumbled through Chopin pieces I’d learned in sixth  grade.  Although my fingers aren’t as nimble they were when I’d practice  two hours a day, I was surprised how much they remembered once they touched  the keys.

The melancholy notes filled the house, my husband peeked into  the living room, surprised at the sound of music coming from our upright, and  my children read books as they lay on their stomachs in other rooms around the  house.  I hoped they’d be humming to themselves.  It was so  different from the usual sound of computer games which wafts through our house, and  I wondered why I didn’t play the piano, or write, or read, or take long walks  alone more often once the fall school year began.

With four children  and a full-time teaching position, each day feels like a game of survival.   The demands of lesson plans, grading, getting the children to practices  and play dates, picking the children up from school, from practices, from  playdates, and then organizing the house just so we know where everything is  for the next day... These are the things which get pushed to the front of my  “to do” list.

But then every now and then, I do something unexpected,  like sit down to play the piano, and I remember that beyond the everyday is  something way more important I shouldn’t neglect.  My husband always  likes to say, “Put the big rocks in before the small ones.”  I nod in  approval, but then I turn around and start hastily gathering the small  rocks.

I’m trying.  

Tonight, I’ll spend the night in a  hostel by the Pacific Ocean with my ten-year-old.  We’ll look for the  perfect pumpkin, have a slow dinner, and then maybe, maybe I’ll be able to  look out into the ocean and watch the waves crash without thinking of anything  else.